Can you believe I'm actually writing another blog in a decent amount of time?!? Me either! I promised you all that I would try to do better and I plan to keep that promise. The last time I wrote, I was just finishing nights and about to begin 2 months as the OB IV or day shift Obstetrics Chief. I became the leader of the OB team which means, as I said previously, that I was the captain of the day obstetric ship. I served as the upper level for two very wonderful interns on labor and delivery as well as back up to the third years running the antepartum and postpartum services and Women's Urgent Care. In the months prior, I had worked with two second years who had a full year of experience under their belts. These last two months, I had the privilege of working with two brand new interns who had never run a labor delivery, had minimal exposure since their 4th year of medical school and had never done a cesarean section. I had to put my teaching hat on. It was quite the learning experience for all of us. I had gotten so used to people knowing exactly what to do and not having to explain why and how we did most things. I constantly had to remind myself that they were brand new at this and would have many questions and it would be my job to provide great leadership.
It ended up being a really great experience. I got the opportunity to show them how I do things. For example, how I labor patients, how I do deliveries, how I do cesarean sections and why I always put all of the layers back together on the way out (I have a "do unto others" policy. It's very hard to get your pre-baby body back when you have a huge separation between your muscles that your guts protrude through). As I said in a previous blog, what most of us do is what our upper level residents taught us in our first few years, as well as things we learn from our attendings. What you end up doing is choosing the methods you like best, mixed with a little bit of your own twang. It was such a joy to watch them blossom over the course of their respective months; Watching them get comfortable managing patients, delivering a baby and handling instruments during c-sections. These are just a few examples of the major things you learn during your first year of residency. It would take 10 blogs to go through every single thing. It's literally like trying to drink from a fire hydrant. They both handled it very well. It was an honor to have had an opportunity to work with and teach them. They're going be awesome physicians.
I would be remiss if I didn't mention the day nurses. Y'all already know how I feel about my nurses (yes, MY nurses. I don't want to share them. LOL)! I love them and clearly covet them. Just like the night nurses, they are just as wonderful and a joy to work with. We worked as a great team to provide the best care possible for not only normal laboring patients, but some of the sickest moms in the state and we did a damn good job of it if I must say so myself. We respect one another, which is key for a great working relationship. We have built a quite a bond over the last 3.5 years. They've had the opportunity to watch me grow, just as I have the lower level residents that I have been working with. It's an honor to have been blessed to work along side them not only in the last 2 months, but throughout my matriculation. As always, I hope they enjoyed working with me as much as I did with them.
My time on labor and delivery has officially come to an end (with the exception of weekend call). I started my urogynecology rotation on November 1 and have desperately missed labor and delivery. One of my staff says that I am a laborist at heart and she is 100% correct. I like gynecology and I enjoy the surgeries, but my love is labor and delivery. I love taking care of pregnant and postpartum women; being with them through the most joyous and sometimes the most devastating times of their lives and caring for them when they're significantly ill. I can't even explain the joy I feel when I am blessed to be able to welcome a new life into the world, being the first to look them in their sweet little eyes and call them by name. If there's a word greater than love, that's how I feel about being a laborist. Older physicians always say "oh, you'll get over that once you get out into the real world." I pray that I NEVER lose that feeling. I hope that it always brings me joy. Yes, I know that I won't be able to make it to every single delivery, because I'd have to forsake my family to do so. However, I do plan to be present and experience those precious moments with my patient's as much as I can. While I plan to practice the full spectrum of general OB/Gyn when I graduate, I will likely become a OB Hospitalist later in life. We'll see.
I guess that's a good segue to discussing my job search. I asked for prayers for my job search and that I would know the job that's for me when I'm presented with it. I went on two interviews since my last blog; one in a small city outside of Fort Worth and another in a suburb of Arizona, which is an hour and a half away from my mom. Both were really great places. I got a call last week saying they wanted to offer me the job in Arizona. I was so pumped that someone would want me to come work for them and that it would be so close to my mom, as I worry about her being all alone up there with no family. I prayed for discernment. I asked the Lord to make it clear where He wanted me to be. When I received the letter of intent, I was disappointed and immediately got this funny feeling in my stomach. It was not quite what I'd dreamed it would be. I'd been told that you always have to negotiate these things and you should never accept the first offer. So, I negotiated pretty well. However, I still had this uneasiness in my spirit. I spoke to my family and my boyfriend about it and kept trying to talk myself into it, but I couldn't get that feeling to go away. I texted my cousin that I was gonna go ahead and take the job and she responded, "I thought God said no…" We went back and forth and she basically said all the things I needed to, but didn't want to hear. God had explicitly answered my prayer for discernment, yet I was planning to just ignore Him because I was so afraid that I wouldn't get another offer. What if I didn't get an offer from the other place I interviewed at? What if I don't get anymore interviews? Yet, the more I considered taking the job in Arizona, the worse I felt. Then my mom asked me if she wasn't there, would I still want to come and the answer was no.
I prayed on it some more and in the meantime started applying for some more jobs in Texas, which is where I really want to go; Houston to be exact. I have the state of Texas on my vision board that I made in January. I had spoken to a couple of recruiters back in May of this year, but they said I was a bit to early, but they'd keep my info on file. In my search since that time, I haven't been applying to the jobs with those recruiter's names on them because they already had my info. Something told me to send my info anyway. I began to get calls from the recruiters that day. While they had my info on file, I guess they needed a gentle reminder that I was still looking. So, I discussed what I was looking for with them and they said they'd submit my information to some of the groups that were looking for new partners. This morning, with an immense amount of fear and anxiety, I sent an email to the CEO of the group in Arizona respectfully declining the offer. Here I am with no other opportunities and I'm turning down a job! My stomach was turning. I'd obeyed God, but it was so uncomfortable. Within an hour of doing that, I got another email from a recruiter I had spoken with in days prior stating that 2 of the practices she submitted my information to wanted to do phone interviews with me next week! I just shook my head, laughed, looked up and said "Look at God!" I then told one of my good friends who just moved to Houston after completing residency this year and she knows the head of one of the practices I applied to and called to put in a good word for me. God was just showing out today! I am believing that He will reward my obedience with the job of my dream. I've written my vision and made it plain. I just have to be patient and wait for the opportunity that He wants me to have and continue to listen to his guidance and follow His lead, even when it's uncomfortable. I'm still praying to have a job before the end of December, but I know it'll happen in God's timing. He didn't bring me this far to leave me! As my cousin Amber would say, He WILL add the SUPER to my natural!
While I'm waiting for my dream job, my residency journey continues with several months of gynecology ahead. As I said, I'm on urogynecology this month which deals with pelvic floor dysfunction, urinary incontinence, etc. Then I go to Gyn/Onc, which y'all know I love. While it's sometimes a heart breaking service, it has some of the sweetest patient's you'll ever meet. I plan to blog again once that rotation is complete. In the mean time, I ask that you continue to pray for me and my little one. We have 217 more days to go! I also ask that you continue to pray for "my situation" that I requested prayers for in my last blog. It is not yet resolved, however I know God is still in control and I believe that the Lord will bring me out! The devil is busy, but my God is GREATER! Thank y'all so much for your continued to support. You're the best!!
Until next time….
Your Favorite MD,
Keisha B.
Mahogany Pearl: "Be obedient even when you do not know where obedience may lead you." - Sinclair Ferguson
P.S. - Funny story about the effect my residency has had on my child: We haven't had to get up as early since I haven't been on shift work. Yesterday morning, she asked "why don't we get up at 5AM anymore." I explained that I'm no longer on shift work so I don't have to be at work as early. She was really upset about it and was walking around the house mumbling to herself saying "I just don't understand why we're not getting up early anymore. It just doesn't make sense." So I stopped that foolishness very sternly and explained that it is NOT NORMAL for a child to wake up at 5AM even on a school day and that most of her friends probably don't wake up until 6:45 or 7 am. She replied,"well, I think it's okay." Then I said, "That's why I'm the mama and you're the child. Now hush and get in there and get your clothes on" Lord, help me! LOL.
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| My baby was Auntie Em in the 2nd grade play :-) |
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